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All About Finding

by New Dirge

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1.
Past a fold of water the rains of March are waning a cold wave moving with ice along the grassfields I miss the graying weather Not every season brings it Degrees falling lower in due time a warm duvet and frozen hands the vapor when you breathe the safety in an embrace a warm duvet (a warm duvet) and frozen hands (and frozen hands) the vapor (the vapor) when you breathe (when you breathe) the safety (the safety) in an embrace (in an embrace) all inching closer in a gelid veil a warm duvet (a warm duvet) and frozen hands (and frozen hands) the vapor (the vapor) when you breathe (when you breathe) the safety (the safety) in an embrace (in an embrace) it might snow this year (it might snow this year) one of few things I expect (few things) one of few things I expect (it might snow this year) one of few things I expect (few things)
2.
Unempathy 03:06
Most of my problems lie outside me Not many inside might be for the best It's hard to sympathize with absent weaknesses fragilities and struggles I likely never felt And those I surely did have been long dead A blessed curse Unempathy Thus I am distant for I stand (mentally) where few also stand with no change in sight Aloof, ignored in true irrelevance in a waltz of one in self-courtship Past pains I felt by now have been long dead A blessed curse Unempathy (Any) questions begged for (questions begged for) (All the) desperate doubts (desperate doubts) (Nothing) ever, ever (seems to) resonate (resonate) Past pains I felt by now have been long dead A blessed curse Unempathy
3.
It's so easy to forget the last second I felt free the last night I rested instants before turbulence (going on and on) but that's what it takes to stay barely sane to look onward and move on (on and on and on) I've repaid my blood ties but I'll continue on the edge unless the knot's undone I'll still be here by then and if again freedom fails me a zealous drone I shall remain though it's so easy to forget the last second I felt free the last night I rested instants before turbulence (going on and on) but that's what it takes to stay barely sane to look onward and move on (and move on) (on and on and on) as conclusion trots closer excitement is my enemy as the ending looms over us patience is my remedy
4.
Lie beside me a while Come long for a somewhere Without obfuscated clouds Where time beats tardily Where paths are built to be walked Bikes yearn to be pedaled Gables under a starlit heaven Lie beside... rows of livelihoods and stories bushes, trees, and flowers abound a perfume of dinner at dusk to us, a vespertine reminder an unfamiliar home
5.
You don't ever meet your steps now every move comes in a random stride Anxious doubts set your brain alight Not a force you'd know to stop What have you done? What was that for? You never know What have you done? With what in mind? The day finds you wretched and aimless The day finds you senseless Giving back what the world offered You've been a fool, not out of fault, don't mind (don't mind) If out of spite, at least be brighter Take a while to analyze What have you done? What was that for? You never know What have you done? With what in mind? The day finds you wretched and aimless The day finds you senseless No-one cares to call you back now But at least there's never time for goodbyes (goodbyes) No-one seems to love you back now You've been simply set aside to be found wretched and aimless It'll find you, it'll find you
6.
What Was Not 03:01
We weren't hiding just standing by the walls Our silent months were nothing to be proud of Your morning perfume a faded dream I laid my coarse hands on your waist's cold, soft skin With how we changed could we still be here? I've considered closure yet I don't know whose door I knock on Your drunken message for every new year in unknown numbers in slurring love tongues Stumbling paragraphs your weeping face your tears of courage your tears of pain Is it all on me?
7.
We'll feel okay not too far from here Like shifting colors bereft of harmony Our blank canvas in darkened shades the lightning (is mirrored) is mirrored on the ground Silence should meet us well Strangers so often speak all day, as if to tell their words are worthless No need for words when we have the rain Why bother speaking if it's all the same For how long, friends, will a river steer your life force, daily chores, and night outs? Take your stands Silence should meet us well Strangers so often speak all day, as if to tell their words are worthless (worthless) Silence should meet us well (meet us well) Strangers so often speak (often speak) all day, as if to tell (to tell) their words are worthless
8.
Quietude 03:21
As there's no point I'll lock my words within I've learned before My voice is poison A quiet throat, a serene mind So excuse me for being so cynical a rotten side, this safety mine that I could never hide A quiet throat, and ever since I know no-one new and no-one knows me The things I do with quietude
9.
Some folk are not remembered, and leave as quickly as they came barely a bump between now and yesterday no doubt good people that no-one seems to mind We're see-through and the sun shines through us We're ordinary and the stars prevail when we arrive Yeah, we're a detail perhaps it's best to admit You're not the only one it's not the end of the world Sing like a mutter in the wind a whisper unheard of we're alike, we're kitchen wallpaper we're road signs, we're living footnotes and it's somehow fine
10.
In Reverse 02:48
See, I won't stay forever don't grow used to my shoulder I'm assiduous, not eternal My leave pries from the corner By then you should be strong I'll spread wings and live on 'cause see, I won't stay forever nor the comfort of my shoulder You should prepare to let go Relearn your crafts of old You never try anymore Regain your own safety You never try and you don't know why You should prepare to let go Relearn your crafts of old You never try anymore Regain your own safety
11.
Years Wasted 03:32
Stuck to each other by mere formality Staying close for no reason other than to not end up apart than to not end up alone so much you gained from me lessons learned, vices lost yet I can't pin down where I evolved what you brought that made me see still a long way to grow and you just won't be there so far from being whom I must be it seems I learned that out of circumstance and it hurt me deep to stay and it hurts me deep to say so much you gained from me lessons learned, vices lost yet I can't pin down where I evolved what you brought that made me see still a long way to grow and you just won't be there Guess all those years were wasted and you were neither lock nor key just a vista along the highway (highway) so much you gained from me lessons learned, vices lost yet I can't pin down where I evolved what you brought that made me see still a long way to grow and you just won't be there Guess all those years were wasted and you were neither lock nor key just a vista along the highway (highway) after which there's nothing left to see
12.
Well, so what if years were wasted? Could we have made them any better? Any aftermath would've been best only avoidance could keep us intact we met blossoming at our skins and lacking in our minds — typical I was awkward and you were cold that should've been it, it sure had if only we had waited till the fad bled itself dry if only we had waited instead of breaking the ice if only we had waited since we weren't meant together if only we had waited since we weren't meant together

about

All About Finding is my continuation of New Dirge, exploring specifics of the sound I presented in the past release. It also treads new ground with some jazzier passages, stranger tempos, and post-rock build-ups.

The poems these songs are built around were some of the most intimate I've written, which became a source of apprehension. Not many might resonate with those words, but they truly represent what I felt.

I hope this album pleases you in some way, though I'm thankful for all of those who give my music a try.

credits

released January 6, 2022

“Jim” — music
Timur Kozmenko — cover photo

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New Dirge São Paulo, Brazil

Emo, slowcore, post-rock, math rock.

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