1. |
To Walk Alone
03:30
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“[...] I've been trying, like, who knows for how long. I can't stand it anymore. Your distance, your attitude... it's taking a toll on me. I seriously believed you could be fixed, and I was dumb for thinking that. I can't fix you, but neither can I be like you. I won't give up a life just to be miserable by your side. Didn't you say it once that you're used to being alone? Well, good for you, 'cause I'm not, so this is over. You're free. Forget about us two, okay? And please, don't do anything stupid.”
This evergreen loneliness
evenlong, always there with me
The sun watching atop
(the sun watching atop) as far
as there is day
By design, winter brings
memories and poetry
for me to sing to no-one
(for me to sing to no-one)
lest I pretend
Skin too rough to sting
Some things never change
What never changed:
I always walked alone
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2. |
Venison
02:46
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Hunted, followed
In her tenderness
Estranged, mellow
Galloping abreast
That meek glare she often gives —
a window or a veil?
The piercing arrow she expects
cleanly through the chest
Mute, mild mimicry
(Silent)
Silence takes her quite far
A river's flow from which to never stray
Mirroring a fading star
Fresh blood trailing her final way
Venison
Soft, scarlet, sorry
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3. |
Not Your Next Score
03:06
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This isn't you
This conversation is over
When you're drunk, you love everyone
Think through the rude
Learn a thing or two with me
Don't you bother until you are sober
'Cause who do you think I am?
Just who?
I'm not your next score
(I seek a lifetime)
I'm not your next score
I'm not another one
I cherished our moments
Things I'll never hide (never hide)
You threw it all away
You left respect aside (left aside)
But we are just friends
and that we shall remain
if nothing else, if nothing else
Nothing else, nothing else
Nothing, nothing
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4. |
So Tired
02:51
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I'm so tired, I really am
I swear I try, I often do
But you won't get any better
There's no fixing human nature
Not the brightest one, let alone the best
Though dedication walks a mile
Got no feather touch for your skin to rest
Though dedication walks a mile
Yet nothing to be done
it's Becoming
And I'm so tired, I really am
No more tries, I'm out of them
Clock's ticking by the second
The end prowls until it happens
Patience running thin, still trying hard
That's how we got this far
Ready for the end unlike for the start
That's how I got this far
Nothing to be done
it's Becoming
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5. |
Content
03:29
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I feel pleased somehow
Despite falling low
In pain there's a comfort
A hurtful, twisted ease
Again, I'm a tough one
You know I'll deal with it
Living life hollow
with not much else
but a stead found
at the bottom
In pain there's a comfort
A hurtful, twisted ease
Again, I'm a tough one
You know I'll deal with it
Time never turns back
That I most surely know
Promise to follow its lead
to go away and stay gone
In pain there's a comfort
A hurtful, twisted ease
Again, I'm a tough one
You know I'll deal with it
Not unlike before, I say
I'm never in disarray
This once is no exception
I lay in calm acceptance
(So glad) can't understand
(So glad) no way to explain
(So glad) no point in insisting
(Thank you) for existing
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6. |
X
02:05
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I did it for myself
I did it for what's right
For so long I lied
Dazed and blind
Your bottles, your smokes,
your herbs, and cans
Your parties, your orgies,
and one-night stands
No more
I've gone straight edge
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7. |
Expectancy
03:09
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I await patiently
In a place of betterment
In perduring coldsleep
All things untouched
So it goes, step by step
Devalued thoroughly
I'm honed imperfection
Absence personified
Longing for a presence
Expecting you, unknown
where all things remain untouched
Expecting you, that we may unveil one another
The future's a mystery
And hope is so tough to find
It's good to keep discipline
No matter if it goes awry
If in vain, so be it
Expecting you, unknown
where all things remain untouched
Expecting you, that we may unveil one another
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8. |
Alates Descend at Dusk
02:56
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The cloudline now darkens
with faltering skies
At last the wings descend
out trailing lights
Watch their instincts fly
as we do ourselves
Like children in disguise
with beards or lipstick
What difference does it make
that lamps don't make us slaves
if we enslave our own?
At dusk befalls the same
At dusk the same befalls
So what? (We tend to try again)
A flight so inane
like topics at the train
we duly oblige friendless strangers
Not knowing where to go — few of us do know
Chaos under hides
At dusk befalls the same
At dusk the same befalls
So what? (We tend to try again)
The last ones find refuge
in waning warmth
Their dry wings lie scattered
across the floor
So mundane, so trivial
Ephemeral
So futile, prosaic
Ephemeral
Alates descend at dusk everyday
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9. |
No Way, Cupid
02:43
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I am but a simple man
come as normal as they get
Got a job and wrote a plan
if I meet the hopeful match
Left, left, will I see you again? (again)
Left, left, right, well, message if you like me (like me)
Left, left, we are faces in a menu, oddly the same
Well, message if you like me
Guess this isn't the right place
I am lost, I'm wasting space
No demand for mixed-race men
who don't wish to fool around
Left, left, will I see you again? (again)
Left, left, right, well, message if you like me (like me)
Left, left, we are faces in a menu, oddly the same
Well, message if you like me
I'd rather live alone
I'll stay on my own
I'd rather live alone
Get more time to grow
Left, left, will I see you again? (again)
Left, left, right, well, message if you like me (like me)
Left, left, we are faces in a menu, oddly the same
Well, message if you like me
Well, message if you like me (like me)
Well, message if you like me, like me
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10. |
A Case of Cluelessness
03:09
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A shut-in day, a shut-in heart
A paracosm torn apart
Socially blind, forlorn child
When to speak or when to cry
What cryptic puzzles
Fearfully stuck to oneself
No refuge outside the room
An awkward semblance
Clueless of all, self-appointed genius
What stories to come up with now?
A world of falsehood, a looming fall
Don't talk to me, don't talk to me
Talk to me
Don't talk, please talk to me
Is this how tough it's meant to be?
Are these the schemes everyone sees?
Which are the words allowed in speech?
So plagued by social insecurity
(insecurity)
Without aid and without guides
stroll in bee lines
Born to translate and act polite
No need to avoid the eyes
just nevermind
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11. |
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No matter how long, I'm still here
always a friend to be
I'm away with my feelings true
Don't take me for a lowly fool
I'm not there but don't be alarmed
When you need I'll keep you from harm
“Seriously, where have you been? I'm always the one who has to strike up a conversation with you.”
Maybe the maps were right
Who would've thought?
I'm not one to think the stars can speak
but if you had a point, then so you did
Take a day or a year to say
what you want, you don't overstay
Predict me — not an easy task
So then how do you hit the mark?
“Are you even still alive?”
Maybe I am a fool after all
just don't belittle me
Patterns bear reasons their own
till I break down again (break down again)
No matter how long, I'm still here
always a friend to be
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